Why do I need peace? I just want to be skinny.
I understand. It is ok to want to be different than you are right now. I have been there. I have been so desperately unhappy with myself that I would do anything to be different and to be skinny NOW. I didn’t want to think, learn, introspect or whatever.
I just needed to be skinny!!!
Being who I was felt intolerable. I don’t know any other words to put to that skin crawling feeling of hating who I was and wanting to be different – but not just any different, skinny different.
It is as if being skinny would some how magically fix my life and I would be happy. Financial concerns would melt away. I would be noticed and loved. Clothes would fit and look perfect. Life would be a breeze. No more struggle, just bliss. I would be special.
I want you to pause and think about your motivation for skinny.
- How do you think your life will be different?
- What will being that size bring to you that you don’t have now?
- What are you wanting it to solve?
- What are you missing out on life if skinny is a top priority for you?
I know that you may not want to think about this stuff but if you don’t take time to do it, I can almost guarantee you are not going to love you, your body more or have the peace you want when you are “skinny”. It will keep you in that cycle of food obsession, the searching for the next magic pill and diet, constantly seeking but never finding.
It is possible that maybe you are not ready yet to take on this journey and practice, that is ok. We can all only get here in our own time. When you are tired of the war, tired of the struggle, tired of wanting to be different than the life you have right in front of you – just start shining some kindness to the deepest darkest most hurt-y places in you. Its a great way to start on the path to peace.
Check out the website for more information about the next up coming workshop. Hope to see you there!!
This is a part 4 in a 4 part series exploring questions around the Peaceful Body Project – happening on 05/31/2015.